Stop Building Programs for Women and Girls...That Men Never Have to Think About
Contraceptives. Childcare. Gender-based violence.
For decades, we’ve labeled these ‘women’s issues’—and designed entire programs around that idea.
The result? A development sector that has quietly taught men they don’t need to think about any of them.
Meanwhile, reproductive rights are under attack, maternal mortality is rising, and the gender pay gap persists.
Clearly, something isn't working.
And in the spirit of Women’s History month, we think we should talk about it.
The Hidden Cost of Gender Silos
At YLabs, our research reveals a troubling pattern when it comes to gender and sexual and reproductive health: isolating women in special programs doesn't just fail to create lasting change–it actually reinforces the systems we're trying to dismantle.
With our Future of Sex Ed study, we spoke to more than 12K young people across Nigeria, India, the USA, and El Salvador. One thing became clear: traditional approaches to sex education that separate young women's sexual health from young men's sexual health are fundamentally misaligned with how youth actually experience their lives.
Young people are learning about sex in isolation, which prevents them from understanding the lived experiences of people who share different gender or sexual orientations. The more marginalized they are, the more isolated they feel, which creates greater division, stigma, and harm.
Young men told us they felt a lot of pressure to manage, direct, and perform during sex–pressure–and that weighs on them heavily. Meanwhile, young women lacked the language and confidence to advocate for their own preferences.
No one is getting what they need.
When we asked what would make sexual experiences better, the answers weren’t anatomy lessons. They were psychological safety. Mutual communication. Trust. Consent.
And those things can only exist when all genders are having the same conversation.
As one 20-year-old male from El Salvador put it: "If a girl doesn't orgasm, it bothers me, because it means I failed." This kind of performance pressure–and gender scripts–reveals how traditional gender norms harm everyone.
The Data Shows Gender Programs Leave Everyone Behind
Our research uncovered stark statistics:
Young women are 2.4x more likely than men to be dissatisfied with the sex education they receive
Non-binary youth are 3.6x more likely to be dissatisfied than their peers
Males are 2.3x more likely to be interested in learning about sexual pleasure, while females are 3.2x more likely to focus on pregnancy and STI prevention
The result? A siloed approach that leaves everyone unprepared for the actual complexity of sex.
When Everyone's in the Room, Everyone Wins
When we designed CyberRwanda, our digital platform for sexual and reproductive health, we deliberately rejected the girls-only model that dominates the field.
Instead, we created content that actively engaged young men on topics often labelled ‘women's issues’–contraception, consent, and sexual health.
And it worked.
Not only did young women report feeling more supported in their health decisions, but contraceptive use increased significantly compared to traditional women-focused programs.
Why? Because we stopped treating contraception as a woman's burden and started addressing the ecosystem where these decisions are made.
This approach aligns perfectly with what our research participants told us:
"Sex education should be included everywhere for everyone, regardless of community settings," Male, 17, India.
From Silos to Systems Change
The isolation of ‘women's issues’ in development programming creates a fundamental disconnect, it:
Reinforces the idea that gender equity is women's responsibility alone.
Fails to address the power dynamics that create inequality in the first place.
Misses opportunities to create allies and champions.
Burns out the very women the programs aim to support by adding more to their plates.
Ignores the experiences of non-binary, transgender, and gender non-conforming youth, who told us they had to figure out their identities and sex on their own, exposing them to riskier behavior and greater internalized shame.
This Women's History Month, we're advocating for a shift:
Stop designing programs exclusively for women and girls. Start designing programs that transform the systems women and girls, and all genders, navigate.
Start engaging men as necessary participants in creating change.
Stop forcing youth to fit into artificial program categories. Start building solutions that reflect the complicated, messy, brilliant reality of their lives.
“Sex education should definitely include pleasure. There would be less rape in Nigeria if we could understand and talk about pleasure more. People would not have to force themselves onto their partners because they would understand consent better.”
As one LGBTQ+ 20-year-old from Nigeria eloquently stated: "Sex education should definitely include pleasure. There would be less rape in Nigeria if we could understand and talk about pleasure more. People would not have to force themselves onto their partners because they would understand consent better."
Gender equity isn't achieved by creating special programs for those most impacted by inequality.
It's achieved by transforming the systems that create that inequality in the first place.
And that requires everyone's participation.
Ready to partner with us to help youth lead the way? Reach out to our team today!
